Saturday, December 24, 2011

Hope Misplaced

I look out my window and see a beautiful winter day. Blue sky, no wind, fresh snow sparkling in the sun. It's a trick sometimes to slow down and just savor these sights, especially this time of year when we are so tyrannized by all the "urgent" items on our to-do lists. Today I made myself pause, however, and not just savor the moment, but think about how I can easily miss a multitude of blessings if I lose my focus.

Have you ever had a plan, and pinned all of your hopes on it coming about, and then realized that it may not after all? That happened to me this week. I realized I had been storing all my proverbial eggs in the same basket. Sadly, that basket did not include much thought about what God's plan might be. It only carried my own. The realization that it might not pan out as I had hoped left me teetering, and eventually, seeing my own folly. I had to seek the Lord to help bring me back to a right perspective, one that focuses on Him, and His will, alone. Not that it is wrong to have a plan, but in everything we need to bring it to Him for approval, and be ready to relinquish it if that approval does not come.

This morning as I contemplated these things, I came upon a blog post. I was just randomly checking out a blog from a list that a fellow blogger follows. She had a list a mile long, but for some reason I clicked on this certain one. She had posted a reflection from Oswald Chambers "My Utmost For His Highest" back in June. When I read it, I knew God had led me there. He is so good and kind to us. He didn't get angry with me for putting my plan on a pedestal, He simply reminded me of some wonderful truths. Anyhow, here is that reflection, which I am borrowing....

"I'm determined to be absolutely and entirely for Him and Him alone." Reflection based on Phil. 1:20

Lord so often it seems I come to this crisis of faith. Choosing between your will and my own, seeing barely the first step in yours and the full schematic design in mine. Reason would say to choose me. But reason is at times a liar and so I go with the Holy Spirit that whispers "Surrender. My child I know what's best, lay it down. Light a fire to it and offer it up to me. Fear not for I am with you. I alone am your heart's desire, I alone can quench your thirst. These dreams are all counterfeit if I didn't write them. Lose yourself in me and find me in you."

Thank you Father.


Anonymous said...

"Someone might ask, “Have you always had such contentment, Joni?” And I would have to answer no. I well remember the first Christmas I got out of the hospital, my first visit home since the accident. Depressed and frightened, I remember going to church with my family on Christmas Eve. One particular carol stands out in my mind. I remember singing, with tears falling from my eyes:

Hail the heav’n-born Prince of Peace! Hail the Son of Righteousness! Light and life to all He brings, risen with healing in His wings.

When we got to that third verse of “Hark, the Herald Angels Sing,” I thought, Im sure this Christmas season I’ll get up out of my wheelchair-risen with healing in His wings!

Little did I know (and I don’t know if I would have understood even if you had explained it to me) that in due time, God would heal me-but on a level I would have never dreamed.

Just two years later, on another Christmas, I found the very peace and contentment that had eluded me. I also found joy, simply because I had embraced His will for my life.

And what is His will?

That you and I be in the best position, the best place, the timeliest circumstance in which God can be glorified the most.

For me, that place just happens to be a wheelchair.

That happens to be my place of healing."

Joni Eareckson Tada, A Place of Healing: Wrestling with the Mysteries of Suffering, Pain, and God’s Sovereignty, Kindle Location 469-77.

covnitkepr1 said...

I’ve been following and enjoying your blog for a while now and would like to invite you to visit and perhaps follow me back. Sorry I took so long for the invitation